Monday, February 13, 2012

When a moment hits you out of nowhere

Any of us who have lost a child knows that the grief of this loss stays with you forever. As time passes the waves of grief don’t crash as often but they still happen. One of those waves hit me yesterday and I totally wasn’t expecting it. My friend Jen shared a video on her blog. It’s a song by Daughtry and it’s one I hadn’t heard before. I was totally unprepared for this song and the effect it had on me.
 
While listening to the song I just started sobbing. The words pulled at my heart. I haven’t cried like that since having to hand my daughter over to the funeral director almost 3 years ago. Cries just welled up and my body was shaking. It wasn’t pretty but it felt good. People may wonder how it could possibly feel good but grief can well up inside you over time and releasing it can be both draining and refreshing. I think I needed that.
 
I’m sharing with you the song but I warn you that it will prolly make you cry. It still makes me cry. It’s moving and it’s so, so true. It makes me realize how much I really do miss her and how much I missed out on. I’m missing an entire lifetime. In the day to day busyness of life I sometimes forget that.
 

10 comments:

Mary said...

Just listened! This is so true! I understand those moments when you just fall apart!

Jessica said...

Love this, thanks for sharing :)

Debby@Just Breathe said...

((HUGS)) Wow, what a song. Thank you for sharing it.

Jennifer Ross said...

I sit here in tears after listening to that beautiful song. I'm so glad that you shared it Holly.

MommyIvy said...

Beautiful song.

CynthiaS said...

I cannot see the song but glad you were able to have a good cry. It's exhausting but so cleansing at the same time.

Keri Kitchen said...

I want to listen to it.. but haven't let myself yet. Even though I'm feeling better over all than I have in more than a year, I have still been emotional.... even had a little break down in the card aisle today when i saw a congrats for twins card. I feel myself choking up even typing that, even though I'm really okay!! goodness, this whole grief deal is just strange.

Deanna said...

I have done that exact thing to this song a few times. We used it in our candle lighting last year. Sometimes it feels so good to cry uncontrollably. I know that the day to day running and doings can keep grief at bay, but it is also hard to make time to let it out. ((hugs)) dear friend!

Crystal said...

Oh, I cried the first time I heard this song!

Crystal Theresa said...

((hugs)). i've also had those moments where the grief just overcomes me, and it does feel good to let it out. i hadn't heard this song before, and those lyrics... ♥

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