Carleigh’s Birthday Celebration

Normally for Carleigh’s birthday we go somewhere on a family day, but we weren’t able to do that this year since we had to leave for a trip that day. We did go to the cemetery and release balloons in the morning. We released 2 pink star balloons and a big unicorn balloon. It was a chilly morning so we didn’t stay long.

I got Carleigh cupcakes and a cake with a unicorn theme to it. The cake was chocolate with buttercream frosting. The cupcakes were chocolate with a peanut butter filling and buttercream frosting. The little unicorns on top were edible and pretty good! Rachel’s Cakes made both her cake and cupcakes.

After the cemetery, we drove back up to my IL’s house and we had the cake and cupcakes with everyone. They had gotten them the night before for us. We took the girls out to my parent’s house with a few of the cupcakes to eat. Both were so delicious!!

Day 6 ~ Capture Your Grief

Ritual: Do you have any rituals to help get you through the day? Maybe it is a daily affirmation or prayer. It could be that you light a candle or recite a mantra etc. Do you do anything meaningful on special dates for your baby?

Every year on Carleigh’s birthday one of the special things we do is celebrate the end of the day with a cake that was made for her. It is something I look forward to as I get to decide what the cake will look like and I always want it to be something special. It’s the one splurge I make every year just for her.

Carleigh’s 4th Birthday

To celebrate Carleigh’s 4th birthday both Anthony and I took off of work and made plans for us to be together as a family (and wearing purple of course!). I made arrangements with the hospital to make some donations to the unit, which included tissues, disposable cameras, and some clay keepsake kits.

I also brought some treats for the nurses-purple cupcakes! They smelled so good!

I was also happily surprised to find out that stillbirthday had donated some Teeny Tears diapers to the unit in memory of Carleigh. That was so nice to see those on her birthday.

I talked to the nurses for a bit, including one of the nurses who took care of me postpartum, and I was telling them about training to become a doula and they definitely wanted me to let them know when I had finished  because they would love to have me come and help families.

Once we left the hospital we went to the cemetery to release some balloons.

I had planned on giving her new flowers but it was a bit chilly out and the water that was in the bottom was frozen and we couldn’t get the flowers out. They flowers still looked good from over the winter so we just left them for now. I wrote a message for Carleigh on a card and also the names of other babies to remember. Lainey and I let the balloons go and they went up and away (the butterfly balloon was dragging a little).

We packed back up and drove to the Cincinnati Museum where we spent the rest of the day. I thought it was fitting that we saw the Omnimax movie The Flight of the Butterflies. It was very neat! We also saw the Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit. The girls enjoyed the children’s museum the most.

 

On the way back home we grabbed some Chick-Fil-A (yummmmm) and the girls slept from all the playing. When we got home it was time for Carleigh’s cake! It was so beautiful and delicious too!

The girls obviously enjoyed the cake a lot. Evanee then had some fun playing with Carleigh Bear, who joined us for the day.

It was a good day for all of us remembering, loving, and missing her.

Hodge Podge

As Kelly would say this is gonna be a hodge podge post! :)

First some things to do with Carleigh's birthday...

Thanks to everyone who has responded to my event on FB for Carleigh's birthday saying that they would remember her in some way on the 28th. It's much appreciated! And for those family and friends who want to join us on the 26th for a small party it is gonna be at our house at 1pm. Anyone who wants to join us is welcome! We'll have some food and cake and then go to the cemetery for a balloon release. We hope that you will join us if you are able!

Speaking of cake, the cake is ordered and I can't wait to see it. I even ordered something today from The Midnight Orange to go on top of it. When I saw it I just had to buy it!

And speaking of The Midnight Orange, I also bought something to give away for Carleigh's birthday. :) I'm looking into a few more things to also give away. Of course, you can be sure I'll also have something from My Forever Child.

On the day of Carleigh's birthday, which is the 28th, I don't have to work since I work the weekend so I also had Anthony take the day off. We're gonna go do something together for the day. We're either gonna go to the Newport Aquarium or to the Creation Museum. We haven't decided which one yet. But also on that day before we head off to do whatever we choose to do we'll drop off 2 memory boxes to the hospital where I work. Franchesca is making up the actual memory boxes for me. I know I liked Carleigh's star memory box she made for me so it just seemed right. So far I've bought a disposable camera and a small lavender candle to go in each. Any recommendations on what else to put in there? Was there something you got in a memory box that was helpful? Was there something you wished you would've got? You'd think I would know but we didn't receive a memory box from the hospital because I knew that I would get one made later. They did offer one though.

I just wanted to share a little something that was shared with me recently. I received a message from a lady named Phyllis who used to be a friend of mine on Cafemom around the time when Carleigh was still with me. She said that she shared about me with her daughter. Through our journey she also found out about NILMDTS and she talked about it with her friend who was a photographer. From their conversation, the friend decided to volunteer for NILMDTS. Then Phyllis' daughter's friend Lacy had a son, Kolton, with anencephaly on November 23, 2010. Phyllis' friend is the photographer who ended up taking their NILMDTS photos. Phyllis thought that I would like to know that telling my story on CM ultimately helped Lacy because otherwise, there would not have been a NILMDTS photographer for her. Just a wow moment for me and proof that Carleigh's story did make an impact. And I'm so glad that Lacy was able to have NILMDTS photographer because those photos are a priceless treasure! Thank you, Phyllis, for sharing this with me especially as we draw closer to Carleigh's 2nd birthday. I just love hearing things like this.

If you've been around these parts for a while you may know that I'm a big supporter of Sufficient Grace Ministries. Kelly, who founded the ministry, even graced me with the honor of being a board member. But being that I live a couple hours away from the rest of the SGM crew it kinda limits what I can do with the ministry. One thing I can do for them is fundraisers. If you aren't aware, Sufficient Grace Ministries offers their products and services for free to all bereaved parents. Because of this, the ministry holds fundraisers so that they can keep offering these services for free and not have to charge parents for them. I know many families out there who have been on the receiving end of this ministry, including myself.

Recently I have taken part in a couple of online auctions and was inspired by them to hold my own online auction to benefit Sufficient Grace Ministries. Right now I am gathering items to auction off and have a good number of items so far. I am also looking for individuals and/or businesses/shops to donate items if they are willing. It could be something little or something big. Anything is appreciated!! If you are interested in helping out please send me an email at caring4carleigh@yahoo.com. I plan on holding the auction some time in the beginning of April. A definite date(s) has not been set yet but I will announce it as soon as it is. Thank you to those who have already helped out!!

Birthday post #2 - The Cake

What's a birthday party without a cake? I knew I wanted Carleigh's cake to be just perfect. So I did an extensive search on the internet for all different kinds of cakes and found one that I knew would be just perfect once we added our own touches to it. Our cake was made by Debbie at The Cake Diva Cake Shop. She did such a great job and the cake tasted absolutely delicious. One of the best cakes I've ever had. Definitely worth the price.

Of course, I had to have it made with things that remind me of Carleigh, like the color purple and stars. After our meal, Anthony and I cut the cake together. It reminded me of our wedding day almost 5 years ago, only we didn't shove cake in each other's faces this time. We gave pretty generous portions of cake to everyone since we had less people come than expected. We got to take some home too, which was fine with me because I got to eat it for like another week. Anthony had this huge piece from the middle of the cake. I don't know how he managed to eat so much of it. Everyone enjoyed the cake along with us.






Anthony and I working on getting the cake ready to cut. I think we were digging something out of the middle.


Our friends Joe & Lauren's son Ben enjoying some cake.

Our friends Rich & Karrie's son Austin eating some cake and getting a little frosting on his face.

Anthony's ginormous piece of cake.

Mommy holding Kyndra while she fingers at the cake.

It's so yummy, Mommy! I want some more!!