First Face2Face Meeting and a visit

Today was the first Face2Face meeting for the Dayton area. We had 3 people come-me, Kim (the leader), and Heather. I was hoping that more would come but 3 is a good start and hopefully in the next meetings we will get more to attend.

I actually got there late because I had to stop and fill my hubby’s work car with gas since it was on empty plus his GPS wasn’t working so I had to talk to Kim’s husband to try and get directions. Got a little detoured but I finally made it. We started off the meeting by sharing our stories and some mementos if we brought any.

We talked about where we wanted to go with the meetings whether to keep it formal or informal, different things we wanted to do, how to raise awareness, how to let more people know about the group, etc. We pretty much decided that we would like to meet twice a month.

We definitely want to do something for October 15th for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Although, I won’t be able to attend this year since we will be going to the big memorial in MN by Anchored By Hope, but I’m still excited to help them plan it and I’m sure they’ll let me know how it goes too.

After the meeting I went home a different route that took me close to the cemetery so I knew I had to stop for a visit. It has been a while since I was out and it felt nice to be there. I actually miss those days when I visited every week sometimes more. But I’m in a place now where I don’t feel like I need to visit that often. Although, her flowers are looking faded and I really do need to get some new ones out there.

I had in my purse a butterfly star stone from My Forever Child and I decided to leave it there beside her other stone I had left on a previous visit.

I had to dust off grass from her stone. The guy was there mowing and there was quite a bit of grass. Bird poop too and I tried to tidy that up as much as I could but I didn’t have a rag with me so could only do so much.

It was interesting that while I was there I encountered a few critters. The first one was a butterfly. I was actually thinking it would be really nice to be able to see a butterfly because it was so nice outside. At that same moment I was thinking it a butterfly flew by out of nowhere! Then as I was sitting beside her headstone a katydid jumped up onto it and hung around for about 10 seconds jumping onto different parts and then jumped away. As I got up from sitting a toad hopped out of thin air and right next to her headstone and then to the side of it as I followed it. I turned my back to look at something and when I looked again for the toad I couldn’t find it.

I don’t often get to sit and reflect on my daughter like I used to even though she is always in my thoughts. The cemetery has always been one of my favorite places to do that. It’s quiet with only the sounds of nature around me, which is why I often like to go alone.